If you are in the NYC area, you probably heard about the awful murder of eight year old Leiby Kretzy. He disappeared on his way home from a summer day camp on Monday and was found dead by police a few days later. The part of this tragedy that sticks with me the most is that Leiby had begged his parents to make the walk home by himself - and it was his first time making a trip solo. His parents practiced the route with him and were waiting only a few blocks away for him. I'm sure they were a little bit anxious about this first solo trip, and it's just heart wrenching that it turned out the way that it did.
Because it's possible that V could grow up in the city, I think about this sometimes: things that I took for granted about my youth - playing outside, going to the store by myself, riding my bike around the block, even simpler things like crossing a street - when will I be comfortable with V doing these things on her own? Riding the subway by herself? It seems like there is a fine line between keeping your kids safe and giving them the freedom to grow into independent people. At some point you have to let them go out on their own, and I don't want anxiety to dictate how I parent, but stories like that of Leiby Kretzy sure make me want to not let V out of my sight, ever.
I can't get this story out of my head, it makes me so, so sick to my stomach.
ReplyDeleteI know. It is just so awful and sad.
ReplyDeleteThis story is just absolutely horrendous, but thankfully extremely rare. Of course when it happens to even a single child, that's a single child too many.
ReplyDeleteI think the fact that you recognize your anxiety will make you a pretty fair parent as V gets older. You can't control everything, but you can do things to protect your child by teaching them practical things (to stay away from swimming pools when adults are not around, not to text and drive as they get older, not to engage in other dangerous activities). Living in fear of the few monsters won't help nearly as much as those other life lessons.
As for Leiby Kretzy's family, I can't even begin to imagine what they're going through. I certainly don't blame them for letting Leiby walk seven blocks, especially in a community where children frequently travel alone safely. I hope they can get some relief from the justice system. My thoughts are with them